On Sex

David K. Smith, 20 March 2018

Got your attention, right? Yeah, well that's because all human beings are hardwired to respond to sexual messages—even the ones who deny it (and maybe even especially). And too many have become "hyper-wired" for it, a consequence of some seriously messed up social attitudes. Let's cut to the chase and get really real: sex is a normal thing. Sex is a natural thing. We've been doing it—along with just about every other living creature—ever since Earthly life forms found out that mixing genes improved our odds of survival.

Yes, this is "evolution" stuff. If you're a creationist, you may as well hit the "back" button now, because you're in the wrong place. Also, if you think sex is "evil" or "wrong" or otherwise "bad," buh-bye! Go back to living under your rock. If you're still with me, I'll try to keep it short and simple for the sake of readers with Attention Deficit Syndrome (although I'll probably fail, because I love to hear myself talk/write).

Think about it: why do so many people—particularly males—get so worked up over S-E-X? Simple. Deprivation creates unnaturally strong cravings. When society denies us what we're hardwired to seek out above all other things, it's just gasoline on a dumpster fire. Imagine being one of your caveman forebears: how could you possibly tolerate living alongside women with no clothing? 24/7/365? Worse: watching your brother playing "hide the salami" with your cousin's sister? In broad daylight, no less?

Back then, sex was everywhere. Unrestricted. Out in plain sight. Natural. After a while, you became naturally inured to titillation, and actual procreation only occurred when all of the stars were aligned (read: all the hormones primed and ready). But now, between clothing and outrageously strict, unnatural moral codes, we've gone to the opposite extreme: just a hint of "underboob" sends many men into sexually frantic spasms. (Why mostly men? That's a topic for another essay someday...)

This is a recorded, verifiable, actual fact: countries where prostitution is legal have virtually no crimes of passion. Ponder this. It says much about where "stuck-up" countries have gone wrong. Especially America: we regard ourselves as being a "modern" society, when we're actually among the most prudish people on the planet, if not the most. Countries centuries older than us have figured this out a long time ago. We're clueless.

This is not to say I advocate anything to do with sexual assault; indeed, I've been described as more feminist than some female feminists. The "MeToo" and "TimesUp" movements are glorious responses to men who somehow think they're entitled to dominate women; they've only done it because they can, because we've all conspired to allow them to. I've long held the belief that convicted rapists should be castrated. And I'll be waiting in line to throw the book at the Weinsteins of the world.

At the same time, as a student of human behavior, I also understand completely how we've arrived at this point. But "understanding" should never be construed as "defending." We're supposedly intelligent, self-aware beings; we ought to know better. Right?

Or are we really intelligent, self-aware beings? Humans pride themselves on these qualities, and yet far, far too many of us continually prove otherwise—over and over again—with primitive, abhorrent, chest-pounding behavior. And here I am yet again with a clear understanding how this mess came about—it's become boring and predictable. It's obvious to those who can truly see.

And it's all because we're barely removed from our caveman ancestors. We wield "technology" and "enlightened behavior" like defensive shields against those who would deny us our accomplishments and superiority over all other life forms. Yet our DNA hasn't changed significantly for eons, and "superiority" is just "dominance." Which really isn't anything to get all worked up about—bigger guns just make more noise.

So, let's take a closer look at those "accomplishments" of ours. Some decades back, a colleague of mine at the time asserted that everything humanity holds as proof of its development and advancement—everything from the wheel to space travel—was a bid for sex. We all laughed at him at the time... until he forced us to think about it; to follow the threads of inspiration for everything we've accomplished all the way back to their origins. And—surprise!—we could trace them back to one thing: a bid to impress a potential mate (i.e., have sex).

When one takes a careful, rational, objective look at these things, one sees the truth in this assertion.

But where does that leave us? Right where we still are. Because one old fart musing about obscure philosophical topics won't change the world. All I could hope to do is perhaps convince some open-minded reader to look at things just a little differently. If only one other person acknowledges the truth in our awkward, ugly, misguided existence, then there's one other person who might take all of this nonsense with a grain of salt, and be a little wiser and happier as a result. Because that's the very best anyone can do in this insane, over-the-top, bizarre, fracked-up world.

And maybe—just maybe—if the reader is female, I might convince them to have sex with me... (insert self-aware winking emoticon here)

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